Nothing can stifle the progress of a budding relationship like the disapproval of your partner’s friends. Whether you’ve been the recipient of mean, sideways glances or rude behavior, it can cause tension and conflict between everyone involved. If you hope to continue the relationship without having to avoid any form of social interaction with your partner’s best friends, then it’s best to figure out ways to improve the situation.
Talk to your partner about it.
No one knows your significant other’s friends better than he/she does. If they’ve shown an obvious distaste for you, then chances are your partner has noticed and picked up on the glares and unkind treatment. If not, then it’s best to ask them about it. Tell them that you can see something is bothering their friends about you or the relationship and ask your partner what you should do. If they shrug it off, don’t make a big deal about it and be open to the possibility that you’re misreading them.
Make them feel special.
One of the best things you can do to win the approval of your partner’s friends is to do something nice or thoughtful for them. You can go out of your way to let them know that you value the roles they play in your partner’s life by buying them coffee, sending thoughtful notes, and involving them in things you’d do with your significant other so they don’t feel shut out. In other words, kill them with kindness.
Watch your behavior.
When you’re in group settings with your partner and his/her friends, be acutely aware of the vibes you’re putting off. There may be a reason they aren’t too keen on you based on certain ways you’re acting. Are you ignoring them and excluding them from conversations? If you have clashing personalities, find something all of you have in common and discuss that. This will make them feel more involved and they’ll see that you’re making an effort to get to know them more.
If nothing else seems to work, then it’s time for you to go directly to the source to figure it out. It’s important to be non-confrontational, let them know how much you care about your partner, and ask them if there’s anything you can do to make them feel better about the relationship. Maybe they’ll come to their senses and realize you aren’t as bad a person as they thought you were.
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